Are arranged marriages more successful than those that are not arranged?
The simple answer to this question is yes. However, there are many factors as to why this is true. Marriage is the foundation for all relationships in our society. The father-mother relationship sets the tone for all households. Additionally, this relationship shapes our thinking and future behavior as well. Most if not all relational interactions can stem from how we have internalized what we saw as it relates to our parents relationship. The son typically grows up and interacts with his wife the same way his father interacted with his mother. And likewise, the daughter grows up and interacts with her husband in the same way she saw her mother interact with her father. Which is why MARRIAGE and WHO you marry cannot be a decision made by oneself. It is one of the MOST important decision that you will ever make in your life.
Statistically speaking in the U.S. the divorce rate is between 45-50% and has been for decades. While the divorce rate for arranged marriages is at 4%. This is definitely not rocket science. And you can see the vast difference..
What is the mindset you must have to choose wisely?
- Be careful not to base everything just on how you feel.
- Be humble and allow feedback from others that love you regarding your choice.
- Do Not Rush.
- Allow yourself to see the person in different situations.
- Remember to pay attention to what you see. What you see may be all you need to see when you are thinking of opening your heart to this question.
- There is no shame is saying this person is not the best for me.
The mindset that makes arranged marriages more successful.
- Trust that your parents know what is best for you as they are your parents.
- Understand that love is not only a feeling but a commitment.
- Enter in with eyes wide open.
- Humble yourselves to one another.
- Understand the meaning of marriage.
- Do not enter into marriage unadvisedly or lightly, but reverently, discreetly, advisedly, soberly, and in the fear of God.”